Paranoia

Been immersed deeply into work these days but hilarious incidents do keep happening at the workplace.

Scene.
Me working late night at the workplace and at around 11:30 PM I decide to get some fresh air and proceed to the lift.
I enter the lift on level 4 and on level 3 another dude (the yo types) enters the lift all equipped with his hands free and staring into the mirror and german combing his hair.
There is a power outage in the building and the lift stops somewhere between the 3rd and 2nd floors. Pitch black inside the lift. We wait for 2 minutes in the hope that lights will come on and lift will start but that doesn’t happen.

He : What’s happening?
Me : We’re stuck, I think that’s what’s happening.
He : Now what?
Me : What?
He : Call up the electrician plz (out lifts are equipped with phones in case of
emergencies)
Me : I don’t know the number.
He : Now What?
Me : twice
He :??????
Me : Wait (and I dial the reception)
Me : (to reception) We’re in the first lift and stuck somewhere between the 2nd and 3rd
floors. Can something be done about that?
Reception : We’re working on it, actually lift has developed a snag and it’ll be almost 10-
15 mins before we get u out.
(the best way to get out would’ve been just to pry open the doors with my hands and climb out. Even reception suggested that. But this was a potentially interesting situation brewing and the other didn’t seem to know the way out. So I decided to stay put).
Me: Ok (hang up)
He : What happened?
Me : (I relate to him exactly what the guy at reception told me).
He : Now what?
Me : (slightly irritated) Thrice.
Me : nothing, now we’ll slowly run out of oxygen and pass out. We wont even know
when we’re dead.
He : (slightly confused) you mean?? We’re gonna suffocate?

He suddenly looks around and sees that there’s an opening at the top.
He looks at me with a grin of triumph (I can see his white teeth flashing in the pitch black darkness)

He : no buddy we wont suffocate. See there’s ventilation at the top.
Me : oh ok. Good for you.

All of a sudden the lift jerks up and moves up towards the 5th floor.

He : good they’ve repaired it.
Me : good for you.

The lift gives a jerk again and drops from the 5th at pretty fast speed without stopping and stops suddenly at the 2nd. The door still doesn’t open. I call up the reception again and they tell me that its gonna take another 5 mins coz theres a snag that needs to be fixed now. The door wont open as well. I tell him so.

He : this is scary. (now that the lights are on he’s back to german combing his hair).
He : Now What?
Me : fourth , nothing, at the most we’ll end up crashing on the ground floor, only 2 more
floors to go.
He : What are you trying to say?
Me : nothing, just trying to put things in perspective.

The lift suddenly gives a jolt and stops again

Me : there’s nothing we can do anyways anyways you’ll at least know what’s
weightlessness on our way down.. and then we’ll crash. Maybe tomorrow they’ll
come n pick up our remains. I just hope my skull isn’t crushed by the impact. Id not
like to die looking ugly or something.

He : (almost scared) is there no way out?
Me : don’t worry, if it happens it’ll be pretty sudden and you wont even realize. Just pray
that you don’t stay alive minus an arm or a leg.
He : (stopped combing his hair) we’re really gonna crash?
Me : no, if things go alright we have a really good chance of around 5% to get out of this
Alive.
He : don’t say that please. (Checks his cell and there’s no range)

Suddenly the lift comes alive and goes fast down, and stops at the basement with a jerk.
The door opens.

He : stumbling out. We’ll take the stairs.
Me : hey man this thing is workin.. come in we’ll go to the reception n u can go up from
there.
He : no I’ll take the stairs.
Me : hey no its big deal.. the damn things now repaired and you’ll have to walk halfway
round the building to take the stairs (this was just to persuade him to take the lift coz
the stairs to reception were just round the corner)
He : no I’ll take the stairs can u please direct me.
Me : ok and I tell him the direction to the stairs halfway across the building.
He : thanx I’ll go now. Lift door closes.
Me : bbye.. (door closes )



Epilogue:
I then had my share of fresh air and walking back to the building when he meets me again. He’s leaving the building.

Me : so.. leaving?
He : yeah, hey dude u didn’t tell me the gate at the other end was locked? I had to walk
all the way back to the front.
Me : oh is it? (trying not to grin) I didn’t know they shut it these days. Anyways I’ve
gotta go back to work gnite mate.


-Antya