Sickness

I live in silence
yet my world is deafening
I exist alone
yet am surrounded by the hounding presence
of those that love.

Their love burns
and blisters
I turn my face from their tears
so as they cannot see mine gleam as well
And I shy away from their touch
only to find that they cower from mine.

I am a beacon of spirit
yet am crushed beneath the shadows of my sickness
the sickness that shuns the morning light
yet cries out when the moon glistens in the nights sky
constantly the pain is etched across my brow
but none dare to notice
as they dare not notice the slipping of my soul into the black abyss
the aching of my soul.

I cry out in the fervent night
when the darkened creatures show their beauty
beneath the night's starry hide
but I know none will hear me.

For I only cry within myself
and cast an emotionless gaze for the rest of the world to see.

It is my mask
and my curse to suffer in silence
while others go about in the wonders of life.

I am stuck in the shadows
alone,cold, barely breathing as the pain erupts
reminding me of the scars
from the pain i have endured over the years
reminding me
and telling me
laughing at me.

it is a message
it is my destiny
a destiny to be...
to be at one with the darkness

For never will you leave its comfort
its prison
you are but a slave to your pain
and are dead in a live body
and this is how it shall be
until the end

-Antya