Sallu Jailed

“Salman Khan arrested in Jodhpur” and a lot of gibberish following that.
How about that on the newspaper first thing in the morning?
When Floyd said "The lunatic is on the grass... The lunatic is in my head" they definitely didn't mean nincompoops being in jails. They were anti ridiculous news in that era, and that compared to the present seems quite golden, what?

Anyways, we, the keepers of the faith, the moral police, the unnecessary meddlers in things that don't concern us, decided (like all others of our type) to delve into the matter and come up with our own conclusions (derivations actually) based on all the on-field knowlege we could gather.

Nevermind the process we followed and such talk, here are the results:
Firstly lets inform you that none of the stuff you get to read on TOI is true, but they do really leave you with plenty of hints. (a la “The Da Vinci Code”)

Katrina comfort blows in – Alwar rapist gets 7 yrs in jail
(Just in case one thought Salman was bad ‘taste’)

This is the real story:
Salman walks in and meets Mr. Mahesh Sharma.

“Hi, I’m Sallu… me in for buck killing (probably)”
“Hi, Mahesh here, I kill only humans (definitely)”

There was a definite sobering down after that.

Elsewhere, the winds of change seems to have reached Mithu Lal Chauhan (jailor in Jodhpur)
He stated “Salman khan behaved well and has given us no cause for complaints”.

We didn’t have to go looking much coz there was a flood of news every minute, right from who lived with him to the 50 gms of “chana” and 20gms of “gur” he consumed for breakfast.

We can assure you that in the midst of all this mayhem, Mithu was looking a little blown (complimentary services by a certain Kat ).

With so much news flowing in by the minute thank god we were spared the glorious potty details.

In pop constipated Bro and up to now unheard of Sis (Alvira) married to a certain unheard of erstwhile star now a black hole (buck???). For purists… try exerting your memory to remember a certain Atul Agnihotri (not Kulkarni).. no points for guessing.. He’s not worth it anyways..

What next? Himesh does a show for jail inmates with that torn cap of his?
Now why that torn cap.. is anybody’s guess. (Curiosity kills the KAT… She went after the wrong head to blow.. but he got LUCKY )

Now more news, which hasn’t been disclosed as yet:

Bro and Sis together ran off to Ajmer to pray . You already know what the newsies told you. What you don’t know is WHY?? The buck killer graciously offered bro and sis to trade places.. and off they ran. To Ajmer to pray “God now that he’s 40+ time to give him some brains (and a shirt). You promised that many years ago.” For the fans of the shirtless wonder already know that he’s blessed with a Brawn .. a heart… and that’s about it.. The brains been missing all along.
Meanwhile, at the hospital in a metro.. MOM got sick. And guess who turned up?? Vivek Oberoi of all the people. Big Question WHY?????

What about the Nagapattinam deal? Did the amma of all tsunamis drive him back?
We didn’t bother finding out. Too much irrelevance anyways.

And wait.. before u guyz think that we’re not upto the times.. let us also tell you that the Buck Killer has just been bailed out… (no kat service this time… we definitely smell a RAT here)….
So now .. no more KAT service.. Mahesh has killed 1 human less.. and Mithu has had one too many..

Also..

There’s this big Reunion coming up (way up).

Definitely gonna cover all that. By hook, crook or Ivory.

More on that after it actually happens. Half the reuniting crowd is still on it’s way up.